Oh my DEAR NAGGI

“No……No..….No…………..kill that bast**d……Maroooooooooooooo” Mr. Kumar was talking while sleeping . It was 3PM and he was inside the reputed software company and got frustrated from couple of months as company deducted his salary because of recession.

“Kabhi kabhi mere dil may……..atha hai……..jaatha hai……..par kaha” Mr.Shambulinga who belies in LOW BLOOD PRSSURE and always through a smile when an unmarried female employee passes his cubical. Now a days he smiles on unmarried male employees also because of new rules and regulation which allows him to do so.

“……………………………………………………” our Mr.Khan who is very silent and hardly spoken human but he uses office computer as internet café and he browse all the sites and downloads everything. His interested subjects are Biology and chemistry.

But all the above mentioned characters are not our story highlight. All the above three(including me) has only one CUBIC-MATE and he is ‘NIgga’ alias ‘DEAR DEVIL NIGGA’ alias Mr.Nagesh who hardly available at his own seat. He is seen once in while infront of the system and every time he will call the helpline to reset his system password. It happens when someone spending his most of the time at canteen, green ground, tea shop, coffee shop etc etc….….

I think I Said something…. Wait I will recap again “Happens when someone spending his most of the time at canteen, green ground, tea shop, coffee shop etc etc….…., …” oh I think I missed something ……….yes ‘rest room’ …… yes ‘rest room’…..yes ‘rest room’…….(Let me go to flash…….sorry flash back….)

It was August 14th; just one day before we got freedom and we never thought our ‘Nigga’ will lose his freedom on the same day. That to in a well built ‘rest room’ which is restricted for few people(confused!!!...go ahead)

August 14th, It was 8.00am and no one in the office, everyone was sleeping at their respective houses except our team who are supposed to be there in the office to attend a conference call with African clients. Normally for my other teams clients will be from UK or US but our team is different, we normally have clients from under developing countries. Most of the time we discuss with African clients as we work on oldest version of software’s. Might be Gorilla’s time.
We are all came to new building (which was opened on the same day) because of unavailability for the meeting rooms in our old building. All of us are in half-sleep mood and somehow we have completed the first half unsuccessfully at 9.30am (at this time most of the employees are inside the office). We had half-an-hour break before the next call. And our manager is strict like hostel warden (female managers are always like this), married female human being (like…like….???????).

We all came out of the meeting room with an ugly faces and our whole body smells like hell. We took some of the empty chairs of the empty cubical and started to sleep by opening our eyes.
Our Nagesh alias ‘Nigga’ had plans of going to rest room and he was calling all of us to accompany him. TERRIBLE…..Have you ever called anyone to escort to rest room? But he did that …. He is such a shameless…aimless….careless human being who was always lazy to do everything. As we are in new buiding, we are not interested use the new ‘rest room’ because of sentiments attached with our old buildings old rest room. But our NAGGI is very creative and he always loves new things(but he doesn’t know that new things are might be interesting but dangerous)

After hearing ‘No’ from everyone, he left to new Rest room of new building with heavy heart, with half sleep and with half bended body. He went close to the rest room and he had 3 choices …‘Male rest room’ ‘Female rest room’ and ‘Handicapped rest room’. But the problem is that all are in symbols (as usual). And our ‘Nigga’ is not good in recognizing the symbols and because of this he got failed 3 times to get his LL (Learning License) for two wheeler as he was unable to identify the STOP signal sign board.

Lets come to the point, he is still standing infront of the rest room and with half sleep, he slips into one of the rest room. As it is early in the morning no one was there in the rest room. And our ‘Nigga’ got shocked by seeing differently structured rest room and he was very happy and praised the creativity of the architect (as I told earlier we are into new building which was opened on the same day). But he was unable to find something which is common in ‘Male rest room’ and again he praised the creativity of the architect. He entered one of the toilet rooms with the entire smile and locked the door.

Happiness is very difficult to carry because it is very heavy. Suddenly he heard some noises…sort of female voices ….variation in the frequencies…. And suddenly our ‘nigga’ recalled the creativity of the architect and he came to know that he slipped into the wrong one that is ‘Female restroom’. He can’t shout…he can’t call…he can’t cry…he can’t go back and he is safe till he is inside one of the sub toilet room. Even though AC is on, he is sweating ……

We are all waiting for NAGGI but he is struck inside the rest room. It is 10am and we need to start our second half but still he is not back. Our manager is getting angry and he is nervous inside the ladies ‘rest room’. As NAGGI needs to explain about some issue(he is best suited for africal clients as he makes some wild noices in between the meeting), his presence was very important and our manager started to ring him and phone starts to ring inside the restroom with the old populer ODD song ‘BOLO TA RA RA RA… BOLO TA RA RA RA...BOLO TA RA RA RA… BOLO TA RA RA RA’ ’ with very loud voice.( I think he is the only one person in our company who has that song as caller tone and also he is the one who keeps his phone in full volume) And he doesn’t know what to do and he disconnected the call . Again our angry lady got more angry and she keeps on trying his number but he is use to disconnect. And our manager post poned the meetings call by another 1 hour waiting for NAGGI.

He has already spent half an hour inside the rest room and every female colleagues of that building use to listen that song for every 2minutes and our NAGGI is so DUMP that he has forgotten that there is an option of Switching off the cell (when we are nervous sometime we will forget our names also. so this is not a big issue atlest for him). Still he is struggling to come out of the female rest room.

Here we are all waiting for him and we are left out with only half-an-hour and suddenly some horror music started to ring everwhere. we don't know what to do as we heard this first time and some one told us that is fire alarm and some of them start to run from the building and some of them start to walk and some of them like us still thinking what to do...slowly everyone started to leave the building except our NAGGI.

And one female started to shout inside the female rest room to come out of the building. Atleast something is favoring toNAGGI. As it is a new building there are only approximately 50 employees and all came out and stayed at so called SAFE AREA. Someone anounced there that fire alarm was a false one ( mock fire alarm) and they want to teach us how to escape from the building when the fire occurs.

NAGGI came out of the sub-rest room and saw that no female human being was there and he was happy and he came out of the female rest room and also from the building and joined other colleagues at SAFE AREA.

MOCK FIRE ALARM team are started to explain us about ‘WHAT TO DO AND WHAT NOT DO’ when fire occurs in the building. And they saw NAGGI, who was coming slowly and he was the last person to join us and that is the reason volunteer called him to the stage to tell him the importance of FIRE ALARM(infact they want to show him as an example and wanted to scould him). He went to the stage and he was standing near to the mike and he has kept his phone in his upper pocket and suddenly phone started to ring ‘BOLO TA RA RA RA… BOLO TA RA RA RA’ .As he was standing near to the mike, it was in very loud voice and suddenly some of the female colleagues recognized the ring tone and started laugh….!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!We laughed after one day as we came to know about the fact!!!!.