Ass Book

One fine day with lots of stress I fell into virtual Shit and resigned from my present organization.

The reason for the resignation is official, personal and financial stress. With this I was not able to work in the current organization.

As per company policy I fell into Notice period and I was jobless so i was free and my mind was working like devil's mind......... Suddenly I thought of taking revenge with all the people whoom i hated most but the question raised in my mind was ‘how to take revenge’? Then I decided to invent something which can reduce my anger and stress. Then I had to come up with a unique un-social network called ‘Ass Book’ with the dashing logo ‘) (‘. This network is used to come out from personal and official problems.

This network is exactly opposite to Faceb**k and you are here in Assbook to take care of your enemies not to make friends. To get rid of the stress by taking revenge which will connect you to lot of people......well... as every human being is at least hated by more than 100 people(as per bannergatta local survey). So the more you hate the more you get connected with assbook.

Now the question is How to enter into this awesome network?…...Well entering ass book is like getting into shit…it is very easy and user friendly.

It will somewhat look like below

) login here (

You need to login between those two as shown above(don't ask me what is that figure mean)…

Once you login, you will get a pop-up ‘Would you like to fall into DEEP Shit?’

IF you click ‘Yes’ then it will take you to the deep shit and you will find lots of shits with deferent colors and flavors (like groups in social network). Remember this is not a social network. It is an un-social network. You can become member of any group to share thoughts with other people who are also in the same flavored and colored deep shit and most of them are your enemies.

Do not try to click on the button ‘No’ as you don’t have option to do so(we have disabled). We don’t want people to logout so fast without experiencing the shit virtually…!!!

If you are getting the questions like "Why we need this un-social network?"            "Is it really worth of becoming member of this virtual network?"  then you are in deep shit and you need a legal acount in assbook.

This network is mainly meant for the people who lives in stress and looking forward to express their anger without hurting themselves or their job or their social respect…most of the time you want to abuse people but you are not able to do so in person as you are scared of so called society and you always looking for a media where you can through your anger without affecting your personal and professional carrier and that media is none other than assbook which is for the devils from the devils.

In this Ass book you can do lot of things,

You can abuse your friends, relatives, colleagues and sometime yourself.
You can also through flavored bombs on them.
You can slap people.
You can bite legs, hands and fingers.
You can spread some disease to them.
You can pull leg, hair, hand.

But you cannot kill them as the same person might be required from other people to express their own feelings. So life of your enemy including you is very precious in this assbook. There is no end of life here...

Well now the question is who will create the person who will be hated by other people …the answer is ‘you’…

Yes…When someone creates his own account then he will be eligible to get hated by others and he becomes an ass member. You can hate other and also you can get hated by others. this is the beuty of this network.

Here you can hate anyone who has valid account and there is a pointing systems here called as 'Hating points'. If someone hates you then you will get one point and if you hate someone then you will lose one point. The person who is hated by most of the people will be the king of the ass. Day by day your points will vary(might increase or decrease) ….

If your point is not getting increased then you can be a gambler and gamble and get the points

There will be a special gambling’s and you can gain or lose your points here. The one of the un-famous gambling is ‘Lift Gambling’. Where you need to predict on which floor lift might stop. One thisng you should keep in mind is that lift can be stopped on any floor randomly and you need to place a person inside the lift whom you hate most. If you predict correctly then you will increase your points else the person inside the lift will get the points and you will lose some points from your account and your points will gets credited to the person who is inside the lift (hated by the gambler). So sometime you might get some points without any reason only if you are hated by other people and placed in the lift gambling.

And also you have Crocodile Lake gambling where you will make your slave to have crocodile ride but he should not be hurt by the crocodile. If the slave completes one full round then you will get points else if crocodile bits him then you will lose points and slave will gets credited with your points.

There is one more dumping gambling where the slave will be dumped into gutter and you should not allow him to come out. Yes you need to stop him by throwing shit on him and if you are successful then you will gain points.

If you reach 500 point then you can make one person as your slave and you can utilize him for your dirty works. There are many un-corporate companies in the assbook like ‘Shit filtering’ ‘Shit shifting’ ‘Shit cleaning’ etc. and you can appoint him as a labor and get the work done which will be one of the finest way to get rid of the stress. You will seriously enjoy even though you are not a sadist.

You need to keep on going in ass acount…there are lot of groups…lot of gambling’s…lot companies and keep on earning points and take revenge on the people whom you hate most… and this should reduce the strain. The people whom you hate will not be aware of this till you share with them. For example you and your colleague might hate same manager then both of you can make him as slave and only if you want then both of you can share this information and make fun of it. At the end of the day authorization will be in your hand but need to be utilize smartly.

Assbook is mainly built to show your anger which should not affect your carrier. This will stop you take some wrong decision at wrong time. So whenever you get angry no need to scold anyone or sending any harsh mail or throwing bottles or staring or getting disappointed or depressed. Just you need to login to Assbook with your own user name and password and take revenge there.

After creating this Assbook, I have taken my resignation back and taking revenge inside the assbook. Today I am proud to be a Assmember.

Do you have a ass with you ? get it done as soon as possible .....

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