60 minutes !!!?????

Story of two people who are at the verge of death…and they have just 60min…

See the corner of your cubical….I will take you to the future cum flash back….

Me and my friend came out of annual health check up(first time !!!) that was sponsored by our respective companies and after the check up….irritated doctor told us that we have only 60 minutes of life (after seeing so many bugs in our body during debugging)…..

Me : dude……
My friend : ya….macha tell me….
Me : Dude…..doctor scolded me da….that to this time da…
My friend : Why?
Me : doctor told me that my lungs is full of customer specific tobacco and he can’t do anything to save my life….
My friend. : Then….????
Me : Then I gave him 10rupees and asked him to repair it in debugging mode and he got angry da….and scolded me that we ‘development specialists’ sorry ‘software engineers’ don’t have brain..
My friend : Ok leave it ….. anyway we are dying na…
Me : ya hoo….my biggest dream is coming true….At last we are dying…dude....super na….we can meet ‘Urvashi’…’Meneka’…’Rambe’…
My friend : Kya be …you want ‘Rambe’….idiot….. be serious atleast when you are dying…
Me : sorry dude…..but tell me one thing…are you going to miss anything by dying early?
My firend : I don’t know da….but definitely I will miss Dhoom-3.
Me : Ya…even I will miss ‘Code Olympics 2007’…..
My friend : oh no…we have only58 minutes…..what to do..?
Me : The best thing that we can do is…..killing someone….why don’t we think of our respective boss…?
My friend : no…no chance….it will take 2 hours to reach their house…we will die in traffic..
Me : No..No….we should not die in traffic….we did so much to this country…people…we should die in a such a place ….(suddenly idea came ….
)….yes….dude…anyway we are dying…why don’t we respect the cause of our death….
My friend : super…run….

(Cause of their death are smoking and drinking…)
Me and my friends start to run to find a bar……may be this is our last run….we were running as if we are going to get Olympics medal….
At last we got one bar called “Die and let others die”

Me : dude…. what a super name da???


Without wasting any time they entered the bar and ordered bucket of drinks to kick of their bucket and also basket of cigarette to burn their a**…
Cheersssssssss………they started …..

Me : doode….(‘dude’ will become ‘doode’…once I start to drink)
My friend : machiiii…..(‘macha’ will become ‘machi’…once my firend start to drink)
Me : why we are dying……
My friend : we have only one life da…that’s why we are dying….machiiii
Me : (crying) doode…if we don’t die for another 55minutes then who is going to pay the bill…..
My friend : No da…I am confident…..we are going to die within few minutes….
Me : doode…..don’t get angry…..can I talk about….(my friend stopped me)
My friend : Idiot….don’t tell….only because of your stories, I started to drink…now again if you talk about that bull shit flashback then I will kill you before you die
Me : Sorry doode…..…My heart pulse rate is becoming slow….i think I will die before you die…
My friend : super da….then I can drink peacefully at least for few minutes….ha ha ha..
Me : ha ha ha ha ha…….see da...we are dying but still laughing...I think this is what life....
My friend : pleazzzzzzzz…don’t start again……
Suddenly my friend got a phone call from a unknown number……
My friend : Machiiiii…..see god is giving missed call da….. he is calling us….
Me : doode…..so only you are going to die….i din’t get any call….
My friend : Idiot …. You din’t pay the phone bill…..thats why u din’t get a call…
We already drunk too much……..yes too much………we are drinking as if we have never seen drinks before…..everyone is looking at us….my friend is continuously getting a call from a unknown number…..according to us we have only 29 minutes to die
Me : doode….we have very less time …..Now tell me what is your final wish..?
My friend : I want to see my grandchildrens….its impossible within few minutes…machiiiiii…what is your wish da?
Me : I want to become intelligent human being…so that (suddenly tears start to flow like municipality broken tap)..which is impossible even if I get another 70 years…..
My friend : That’s true….da….see I have done so much bloody coding but it din’t save my life…I went to gym but it din’t save my life…..i have completed my degree but it din’t save my life….i took a 30 by 40 site but it din’t save my life…..nothing is permanent da…….
Me : Doode …don’t worry da…still we are not dead…..
We drunk like hell and my friend's phone was ringing like anything….
My friend : doode …how many minutes left?
Me : still 19 minutes da….anyway we won't die suddenly ……it should compile and give short dump then only we can die
(at last he pick the call…..he was talking to someone .....but anger was floating in his face)
Me : Doode…what happened ….are you angry????
My friend : No…no…I am very happy….s**ks ….it is my cell(looking at his cell)….and I am paying the phone bill but most of the time people called me to contact you……shi*
Me : ha ha…..ok leave it…tell me know who called now….
My friend : urmila……….
Me : super……from heaven naaaa?
My firend : Customer care……she called me to inform you to pay the phone bill….
Me : Oh no……..see doode…what a artificial world…..they don't leave us even while we are dying….
(again he got a call…..and this time doctor has called him but he disconnected the phone…. Just after that he got one more call now he got angry and he gave me the phone to talk…as he thought that again customer care people are on the line….)
(I took the phone and ……..)
Me : Hello…(I said 'hello' as if I am the owner of the ozone layer)
Other side : sir….good evening….this is Chamapakali calling from 'Jingilala insurance company' …sir …(I stoped her…)
Me : what ????
My friend : who is calling machiii….????
Me : wait ra......????(I replied to my friend by covering the phone)
Other side : sir…we have a amazing plan…..sir…just pay 2000 rupees now and you will get 20 lacks after you die …..its a super dying offer sir…(again I stopeed her)
(I called my friend by covering the phone……)
Me : doode….listen …..how much you have now….because if we pay pay 2000 now then we will get 20 lacks after our death…20 + 20 lacks… we can open a small scale industry at the border of hell and heaven…..what do you say….
(my friend slapped me…..woo…what a reply)
Other side : sir…sir…..
Me: Ya….Can you come here…
Other side : where sir????
Me : bar….
Other side : bar?????
Me : I told my friend about you offer and he slapped me can you come here and slap me again to the other side because it was my fault that I picked your call while I am dieing …(suddenly phone is disconnected from other side…..)
My friend : machiii…its time to write parting note………..
Me : ya….da…..comeon start…
My friend : 'to all beautiful cigarettes and romantic beers….it was great to spend time with you people….thanks for your kind support…..(I started to continue…
Me : …..'even thanks to all banks and all debit card and credit card which made us to drink all the time….'
My friend : oh no………..shit….
Me : what happened ……?
My friend : I am married ra…..
Me : what a coincidence even I am married ra…..
(Actually me and my friends are married …..but we forget to inform our wives that we are dying….)
My friend : we need to call them and tell them that we are dying…
Me : no use da…..they will scold us….as they know that we are drunker and they think that we are lying or joking....….
My friend : but……………
Me : ……..but we have 9 minutes to die….doode….
My friend : What happened
Me : I think I am dying….
My friend : what happened…????
Me : my heart beat is becoming slow…..my eyes are closing……
(suddenly my friend started to cry and as if I am dead…..)
My friend : nooooooooooo………….machiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii………….i lost one irriting insect………machiiiiiiiiiii
Me : doode………..
My friend : oh…still you are not dead………????? Simply I have shouted ….rollback rollback…..(he is trying to recall his words…) rollback ….rollback…..
(at last bill came………..but 60 minutes are over………..we don't have money to pay……………….)
Bar man : sir…your bill…
My friend : but we din't ask for it…..
Bar man : but my manager wants you to take this bill…
Me: ok…give…we will take this ……..
(With an innocent face …… I took the bill and kept inside my empty valet and took my friend and started to move out of the bar…suddenly two things happened one is my friend got a call from his wife ….and second one is ...?????)
My friend : hello dear .....……this is your husband…(drinking effect...)
His wife : shut up….
My friend : (my friend closed his mouth)
His wife : (after few minutes) why the hell you are not talking…??? (see that's why wives are wives….she asked him to shut up….and again she is questioning…???)
My friend : ya tell me…
His wife : why ????.....you don't have money to pay the bill????
My friend : who told you darling…I am working…i am inside the office.......today we have a release…..
His wife : Shut up (again silent …….)
My friend : (also silent) (but not the phone bill….)
(small history for this…..actually me and my friend use to drink and smoke before the marriage but we left after our marriage but because of some unavoidable circumstances we started again after 6 months of the marriage…..and our beautiful wives come to know about this…and they made very big plan of 'MISSION : death within 60 minutes'…..they consulted a doctor(where we use to go for annual health check up) and asked them to give a wrong report …by this they want to avoid us to not drink atleast for a day ......well….noramally we use to reach our stop at 8.15pm (night) and we use to drink for an hour from 8.20pm to 9.20pm……and one fine day we caught…and they planeed above mission...and they started to follow us till the bar and they waited near the bar with lots of hope that we don't drink atleast for that day……but it din't worked out…..instead of that it damaged more…..normally we use to drink 30ml but that day we drunk 3000ml….(so the damage occurred 10times)…that's why 'NEVER EVER GO WITH AN NEGATIVE APROACH WITH ANYONE'....either to make some one to work or for make some one to leave some habbit...or make some one to achieve something....'BE POSITIVE AND GO WITH A POSSITIVE ATTITUDE AND APPROCH'....….'JUST A SPOON OF LOVE CAN STOP BARREL OF BEERS' )

(after that they realized their mistake and we realized their mistakes and also our mistakes and now a days we are going to 'YOGASANA' form 8.20pm to 9.20 pm………………………..wait………wait……….ok leave it!!!!)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!